Something Better
by Kamikakushi
Summary: [NejiTenten] They were children once, who loved each other innocently, unaware as to the degrees their love and passion would become. But people grow up, even if we don't want to. [Complete : My 40th fic]
1. Part I

**Something Better**

_By Jia Zhang_

Part I

* * *

_If I were a wagon wheel,_

_Would I then cease to feel?_

_Would it matter if I were unclean and battered?_

_Could I travel the rocky road,_

_In a pair, yet all alone?_

She threw the kunai angrily at the tree, cracking the wood and sending a long scar down against the skin. It split open, the tree, as if it threatened to bleed from the insides. That was what she felt like, screaming, bleeding, cutting, burning, hoping to be rekindled by the dream and the fantasy of what was once there. But it wasn't the same anymore, and it would never be the same again. She simply had to take it all in, and accept this as reality. She couldn't go on pretending anymore. She was tired of this façade.

She was tired of perpetually pretending that there was something there, but when in truth it was too much like the hollow insides of a tree.

She wanted to throw up, to pour out her insides and cry against the world of her anger, and her pain, and the dull and numb feeling that she wished would help silence whatever fired burned within her. She was tired of this—too tired of this damn game. She wanted to hurt, for anything to hurt, to break glass into shards, smash the tree into pieces, and all let it fall into the flames of the Inferno, to join her in her moment of utter desperation.

She hated him—she absolutely despised him. She wanted to tear him into pieces, to make him break like stained colour-glass.

She was sick and tired of this torment, of his apathy at everything. Especially her. She wanted him to feel, for him to breath and be human for one moment in his life, and not be just some reflection of a perfect image. She wanted more, she wanted to see more, but most of all, she wanted him to be more than this—this mannequin, this puppet, this absolutely false reflection.

And she felt all this because she had loved him, because she had fallen in love with an impossible man—someone she had knew for so long, so well…so she should have known that he, of all people, who was place on a pedestal of glory and power and strength, would never love her back.

"Aaaaaaaah!" she cried in anger as she threw another kunai into the tree. "Bastard!"

_Never knowing when it'll end, _

_I quickly land in my old ruts._

_You'd think I've been used enough,_

_As I bring you something better._

_What will happen when you get there?_

_Would you just leave me here?_

_Are you trading up for something better?_

She never had the intention of telling him how she felt about him. At the beginning, she _never_ loved him like she did now. Before, she had always admired him quietly for his strength and power. For his absoluteness. They complimented each other well, knowing always what the other thought. They were an unbeatable pair, and she had helped him on his way to the glory that she always believed he deserved. To her, he was a god—a glorious marble statue that stood in perfection, cold and soft to the touch. Something you were never allowed to feel.

But she had been young then, clueless as to what the world offered her on a golden platter made of jeweled rubies and emeralds. She had been too naïve as a child, too lost in her own world, to perfect herself, to make her what she should be—his opposite, to be his other reflection.

Unfortunately, like all people, she grew up. She changed and altered, finally born away from her pristine chrysalides shell. He had never had one, she knew, and she felt ashamed to have needed a transition to change into this black butterfly. But it was as this butterfly that she fell in love—fell drowning in this bitter-sweet elixir that was warm and twisted inside of her. For the first time, she felt it—true, unadulterated, absolute love and devotion. She would have gladly placed her body and soul in his hands.

Ah, but the story is never as simple as we want it to be.

She knew him best—the way he moved, the way he thought, the way he looked through _everything_, including her. Sometimes she felt so naked standing in front of him, completely bare to the bone. Everything she did felt utterly useless sometimes, because he would always expect it. He was her prophetic conscience, and it was because of him that she had been able to grow.

She knew him best, and he knew her better than anyone ever could. It all seemed too much like a fairy-tale, that threatened to crash and burn.

_If I were a broken doll,_

_Would you even care at all_

_if I were old and torn?_

_Would you help patch up my rips?_

_Or would you just call it quits,_

_And buy a newer model?_

She never intended to tell him anything, after she realized how deeply in love she was. She knew him best, so she knew exactly what reply she would receive if she had poured out her heart. It was too dangerous, too frightful, for she was still so young and feared of the repercussions on her broken heart for this unrequited love. So, she took what she could, and stood by his side through all the storm of the ports, through everything. And that was the trouble, for she'd come to love him even more.

She loved him for his strength, his enigmatic presence that seemed to light her senses on fire. She loved him for his ability to come through all the hardships thrown at him. And she loved the fact that even through all the pain he had gone through, he was still this perfect statue of clear marble—that he was still him, never changing, always with his firm beliefs and morals.

But what she loved most was how he'd watch her, with eyes that saw right through her, seeing everything about her—all her hidden scars, her secrets, her lies, her pains, her dreams…And he had done what she had done, stood by her side and helped her grow.

She was so grateful to him.

She was so madly, furiously, so deeply in love with him.

And one day, so ordinary in essence, so plain and simple and unimportant, that she finally spilled out her insides and told him she loved him.

"I love you…"

The reply was not what she had expected.

Would you still sleep with me, 

_Or have you given up that security,_

_Knowing that you're safe?_

_Have you grown tired of these games we play,_

_Have you put me away,_

_Forever more?_

_Would you cherish the good times together,_

_Or would you find something better?_

For a long time, she danced in this world of bliss and love and happiness like nothing she had ever known. He was her knight in shining armor, made of gold and silver. He became her everything. For the first time, she was able to pass that velvet rope, and touch that golden statue that stood eternally on that far away pedestal. She had gone to where no human had ever gone before, inside the caverns of his heart.

But even then, she was naïve too, for she knew him better than anyone, she should have expected differently.

Everyone had always thought he was this constant force of strength, yet cold as marble and twice as hard, who was this heart of ice that could only be melted by the Sun. She wanted to be his light, his pillar to show him the way to all the human feelings he had shunned and forgotten. She wanted to show him love, to give him happiness that would be endless. She wanted to give him the world, starting with herself. And being this naïve child, she thought she would be the one to break his iron exterior.

Such a foolish girl she was. She believed so much that if she loved him enough, everything would be like fairy-tales. But the life they lived was far from that, far from the pristine and clean image of perfection.

She should have seen this coming; after all, he wasn't just some simpleton. He was a Roman Emperor, more magnificent than any god. She should have seen it coming, for she was just a simpleton, a nobody-special girl, who had tried her hardest to reach a standard that would match his. She wanted to be like her god. She should have known better, since she knew him best of all.

He broke it off rather unexpectedly. It came, out of the blue, simple words uttered, with simple reasons that all made too much sense. He had a responsibility, a goal to achieve—this was what Fate had handed to him since the day of his birth. He couldn't love her—didn't love her…only wanted to explore and grow. But he had found someone else, someone better, someone that truly did compliment him.

She knew him best, so why didn't she see this coming?

Not even the Sun could melt this ocean of ice.

_If I were a shattered mirror,_

_Would you still keep me near?_

_Even though I'm cracked and useless_

_Would you help collect my pieces,_

_Even though you might get hurt._

_Would you still look at me,_

_Or would you only see_

_A warped image of what was there before._

It hurt. It hurt so much that she almost believed it to be a physical wound that shed blood and left a scar. She nearly wished it would be, so it'd heal and she would be able to move on. But in her heart, that was left broken and shattered into pieces, she knew she would never get over this. He had been her one true love—that someone you search for your whole life. She tried to fly towards the Sun, only for her waxed wings to be melted, letting her fall into the sea and drowning in her own cruel torment.

And here she was now, this shattered doll—those rose coloured-glasses she had worn were nothing more than dust and mold. The fantasy she had lived was nothing more than just a mere shadow of what it once was before, and she was left with her extravagant cramps, begging to be save from this whirlwind.

She should have know better, should have known he could never love her like she loved him. She couldn't melt his heart—he had found someone better. She was no more than a left over carcass.

She threw another kunai, before running forward and thrusting the shuriken into the tree. She twisted it, plunging it into the bark. She hated him, for breaking her heart and making her think he could love her. She hated him, because beyond everything, she still loved him. And she would always love him.

She broke down, falling to the dusty ground as rain fell from her eyes.

"Neji…why?"

_What did you break me for? _

_Don't you know that means seven more_

_Years like the last one._

_Would you hide me in a room_

_Up where I can't bother you?_

_So you can find something better._

_You've found somebody better…_

* * *

to be continued

* * *

**Author's Note:** This was written at midnight, and I am tired and sleepy. So screw it. I think it's actually pretty good. The song is made by a friend of mine, Christine Blight, who's kickarse song inspired me to write. At this godforsaken hour in the morning. Oh, and read and review. Neji's thoughts will be posted later. A totally major "sankyuu" to my wonderfully fast beta, K-chan. I'd be dead without your help.

_Jia Z. _

* * *

© May, 2005 by Jia Zhang. All rights reserved.


	2. Part II

**Something Better**

_By Jia Zhang_

Part II

* * *

_Eyes light up by candlelight,_

_Whispering softly to my soul,_

_Trying to find words to describe_

_Whether or not you make me whole._

_I sit back and you relax,_

_But you were all alone._

_Don't get too comfortable,_

_I swear it's just pheromones._

He watched the water with sullen eyes, monotonous, void of any emotion. He picked up a pebble, smaller than the tip of his finger, and dropped it into the water. Ripples ran outward, as if to escape from some mysterious foe. That seemed to be exactly what he was doing—struggling and fighting against some enemy, forgotten by all but him. It haunts his life daily, putting him through a cycle of heartache and heartbreak, whether he was the catalyst or the resultant. He felt so dull, a seed covered in dirt and mold, too tired to break free from this hold that was thick like molasses, and twice as cold as snow.

He had fought—fought as hard as he could. He was a warrior, with strength and great agility, who could break through any barricade that was erected before him. But this—this was too much to break, too hard to smash, too thick to travel through. This was the weight of his destiny.

And he could not escape it, this cruel fate of his, which had robbed him of everything.

But he had fought it for too long, and too hard, and when it counted most, he couldn't push against this crushing tide that engulfed him and swept him away into oblivion. He felt dead, utterly lifeless—a mere corpse, lying cold and alone in a dark alley.

He dropped another pebble into the water, and watched the ripples float outward. Someone had once told him that we were all pebbles, and that the actions we make ripple across time, and change everything around us. But in his case, he was more of a rock, that dropped and made a splash that left all those around him in shards of rock and glass.

He never wanted this—he wanted to be free, a bird that could spread his wings and fly away into the horizon and the Sun. For so long he had been locked up high in a sweet bird cage, and finally he had broke through and found the paradise he was looking for, found the song he so longed to hear, only to have that sweet music silenced and smashed into pieces. The rose-coloured glasses he had worn for so long had finally shattered, and he was left with this bitter tasting reality.

He had so many regrets, so many things he wished he could have said, should have said, but never got a chance to. And he never would. He always thought that he would have all the time in the world to be with her, to be near her.

But his fantasy, his happiness, was shunned into obscurity.

_Do I or don't I baby?_

_What shall I do with you?_

_Pointless thoughts say maybe,_

_Could my love be true?_

_There's times when you're too good for me_

_And others when you're not._

_How could you be the one for me?_

_You're not the one I sought._

_But then there's time when you look at me,_

_Like I'm the only one you see…_

_Then, like a dream, it's gone,_

_And I know what I'm doing is wrong._

He never expected to fall in love, much less be loved by anyone. There were so many things that had happened to him that made him the way he was—the loss of his father, the pain of growing up in the shadows, and the duty forced upon him by those who he burns with an immense hatred for. He had planned to become strong—strong enough to break out of this cold mold, coated with tar and rot, stuck in between a rock and a mountain.

Throughout his life, his one goal was to be strong, to gain back what he had lost, so he would never again be broken by the bonds of his pathway. This had been his goal, and she had always understood that better than anyone.

She was never something you'd call beautiful—fair in a sense that fair was fair. There was nothing about her that would make her stand out. At the beginning, to him, she was just some nothing-special girl, absolutely ordinary, like any other girl. But that was when they were children, when they helped each other to get stronger, to reach the peak of their Everest. They were teammates, comrades, people who you could trust. That was all—a nothing-special sort of girl.

But she became much more than that.

Somehow, and he did not know why, nor did he chose to question it, she always seemed to understand what he was thinking. She could understand his mood; his goal, his desires, and she always, _always_, pushed him to strive to be much more than even his goal. She became his muse—she became the force that drove him, the strength behind the mask. She was much more than a nothing-special girl—plain and ordinary at first site, but once you look into the depth of her eyes, you could see strength greater than anyone you will ever know.

And he was moved.

She became his confident—his first real friend. She would get him out of bed in the morning, train with him, eat with him, and be by his side every step of the way. For years, they stood together on their journey, side by side against all foes and enemies. As a child, she had become more to him than anyone had ever had. She had carved for herself, without even meaning to, a place inside the caverns of what was left of his ashen heart, frozen inside an iceberg.

She became his everything.

Even though he was the one with eyes that could see through everything and everyone, in front of her, he was bare to the bone. He could never hide anything from the brown orbs of her eyes—the Machiavellian smirk in her smile would take his breath away. And she was strong, unique, a rose that grew within a battlefield of bloody carcasses and the smell of rot. She became his Sun, that melted away all of his worries and nightmares.

And secretly, without even knowing it, he'd already fallen under her spell.

_Do I or don't I, baby?_

_What shall I do with you?_

_Pointless thoughts say maybe,_

_Could my love be true?_

_But when I look into your eyes, _

_There's no way to summarize,_

_The way I feel inside._

And he watched her from afar—admired her serene beauty, and her gentle strength. He admired her for her wit, her ability to see the best out of everything. And slowly, he found himself fallen deep in love, far deeper than he had ever imagined. From when they were children, to this moment in time, they had grown so much, yet changed so little on the inside. And she still meant everything to him.

He'd get jealous at all the men who would stare at her with eyes of impurity, although he was unwilling to admit it, so did he. She had grown up, to change into a butterfly, more graceful than any monarch. When he realized how he felt, he was so afraid, for the very first time. He was terrified that someday she just might love someone the way he loved her—and that would've hurt him more than any weapon ever could.

He knew that she was so much better than him, a warm hearted girl, with more strength in her soul than any warrior. She was the most trustworthy, the one who would never abandon a teammate simply for a mission. She knew the importance of life, and its true value. He knew that she was so much better than he was, that she deserved so much more than he could ever give her. And sometimes, he wondered if there was one in a million chance that he could take her hand.

So, he was more than just a little surprised when she told him she loved him. Just like how he loved her.

For the first time in his life he was finally truly happy, being with that one special person you looked for all your life. For the first time in his life, he felt as if all the pain and scars left on his body had been washed away by the rain, leaving only her soft kisses. For the first time, he could finally touch her and hold her as he always wanted to.

For the first time, he was finally happy.

But fairy-tales don't exist, and his came crashing down into ashes.

_Perhaps sometime I'll decide, _

_But then it'll be too late._

_The gap between us is too wide,_

_Life is wasted on those that wait._

_Now when you look at me,_

_And you take my hand,_

_I begin to understand,_

_You're not for me…_

_You're not for me…_

The arrangement came quickly. He did not know of any of the plans of the Main Branch, until the day the Family came to speak to him. He was going to get married, that was what they said. He was going to get married, to a girl he did not know. He was going to get married, and there was nothing he could do. This was his duty. Finally, his fate had caught up with him.

He was once again being torn into pieces, and she was not there to pick them up.

The woman he would marry, she was from a respectable family. She was fair in beauty, but to him she was a mere doll, nothing more, with no originality and soul. This was the woman the Family wished for him to marry, to bare children with, so that they as a clan could prosper…because of all the help she had given him, he was finally strong. This was why his duty had changed.

But then again, so did his goal.

It had changed a long time ago, when he began to notice the sparkle in her brown orbs when she was happy, the dimples in her cheeks when she laughed, the torment in her eyes when she was sad, and the fire that burned within her when she truly needed to be strong. Because of her, his goal changed. His purpose changed. No longer did he simply want to be strong—no, he had already passed that goal and reached the one she always wished for him to achieve. He was now fighting to protect the people—to protect her.

This goal, once again, was being robbed from him, like everything else in his life.

This time, he had no way of getting away from his cage. He was trapped, and he could no longer fight. And this time, she could not help him.

It pained him so much to have to end his sweet fairy-tale. He wanted so much to be able to stay with her forever, the woman he had come to love. It was mere admiration at the beginning, but now it had become much more than that. He didn't want to end it. He didn't want to tell her what his fate was forcing upon him again, because just like how she is and will always be—something that he loved most—she would support him to break from the hold of his family.

But he knew that if she tried to help, she would be much more injured than from a simple heartbreak.

So he lied—for the first time in his life he lied. He told her the polar opposite of everything he truly felt for her. And he watched, his heart heavy like stone at the expression that crossed her face. Surprise, shock, anguish, sadness…it hurt him to watch her like this. He hated this all too much, so much that he felt like exploding—but at least, even if he was forced down this road by his fate, at least he hoped she would one day move on from him, for her to one day find the happiness she so rightly deserved.

Because she was so much better than him, and she deserved so much more than what he could ever offer her.

She deserved to find something better.

He dropped another pebbled into the water, watching the ripples flow across the surface. An action was created, and the waves crushed whatever happiness he had left. But at least, someday she would be happy. For now, and forever, that would be his goal.

"Tenten…I'm sorry…"

* * *

_Do I or don't I, baby?_

_I know what to do with you._

_No longer do I ask maybe,_

_I know I don't love you._

_I don't love you…_

* * *

to be continued

* * *

**Author's Note:** Yay! Happiness! I finally finished the second part of _Something Better_. I hope to dear God that I kept Neji in profile, and hope that I didn't turn him too out of character. This chapter is once again put to my friend Christine's song, and I will burn you if you try to steal it. I also want to thank K-chan, my supreme holy beta for editing this chapter for me. Oh, and don't forget to read and review. The last part of this fic will be posted soon…in a few days or so. Look for it on my Live Journal, alone with all my other crap...

_Jia Z._

* * *

© May, 2005 by Jia Zhang. All rights reserved.


	3. Epilogue

**Something Better**

_By Jia Zhang_

Epilogue - Strangers

* * *

_I__'ll always remember these times  
Even when they fly too fast  
But that's how it seems to stay now  
There's no way to bring it back  
I watched you turn away from me  
And though it was no surprise  
I wish I could see you once  
From someone else's eyes_

They were children once, and they loved each other innocently, unaware as to the degrees their love and passion would one day become. When they had been children—unique children nonetheless—everything was so much simpler. Everything was easier. They had no worries of the boundaries in which they were castrated in. Locked forever up high in a birdcage—they were oblivious to the song they constantly sang. When they were children, they were always together, and they basked in the time that was offered to them. They enjoyed every moment with each other, oblivious as to how much that would come to mean, and how much of those precious memories they would be able to hold on.

When they were children, nothing in the world mattered to them, because they had already found that special someone.

That was when they were children…

But people grow up, whether or not we wanted to.

And grow up they did, shaped and tormented by the yellow brick road of their fates, that seemed to spiral down nowhere, far past that glistening Emerald City. When they were children, they loved innocently, but once they grew up, everything changed. The roads they took parted from each other, perhaps never to meet again. When they grew up, they were met with other responsibilities, destinies in which they must fulfill. When they grew up, the innocent love they once shared was torn into shreds, red velvety fabric ripped and frayed into little pieces of crimson. The love they once shared as children was broken, and they, as adults, were mere reflections of their former selves.

Everything changes when you grow up, people you once knew may not be the same person you know so many years later. The weight of time, and the tides of life, crushes what our original structure used to be. What we once were as children, we could never be again. We can never have those sweet moments of holding hands, of sharing laughter, of simply being with one another. That is what they lost—their time, their childhood…their happiness.

They were now older, changed and transformed—no longer were they the innocent lambs of their golden ages. They now had children themselves, and they had new responsibilities to conform to. They had a new pathway to follow, which would lead them only further from each other.

Perhaps, someday they would recognize that they had lost something precious—when they were older, even wiser, to see that the other half of their soul had been torn away from them. They may wish to try to gain that back, but it simply may be too late, and time has already swallowed whatever hope of true happiness they once had. Maybe, they would remember all those sweet memories; remember their love for one another. Childhood romances never last, they say, but it doesn't make them any less real, any less passionate, any less special…any less destined.

Maybe, it would be sudden, a catch of the eye, a touch of skin, a simple word uttered…to bring it all back again.

But until that happens, they were nothing but strangers to each other.

_We might as well be strangers  
And I know we can't be friends anymore  
There's no happy ending here  
Can you tell me, what's the point?  
From birth we're dying, what's the use in trying?  
So we might as well be strangers  
_

Their lives had gone on…

Her heart had been broken, shattered completely to the point of no resolve. For so long, those around her were terrified of what she may do, but none of them realized the degrees as to how truly devastated she was. Everything she had thought to be true unraveled to become nothing more than a mere façade. Her wondrous and fantastic love story became just a cruel and twisted version of Shakespeare's great tragedy. For so long it had hurt, so much that she wished it to be a real wound. For so long she couldn't stand the site of him…and she constantly wondered "why?".

But hearts are broken, and hearts are mended…slowly, very slowly and softly, so did her's. She grew up, learned to overcome the painful heartbreak of her childhood. She grew to be a different woman, stronger and braver than she ever could have been. Time passed, and life moved on for her. Slowly, her wounded heart began to love again, and slowly it began to heal even more…

Slowly, she began to lose that taste of her first love.

She had met him rather coincidentally, a partner on a mission. He was kind, soft-spoken, rather silly, but that had made her laugh, after such a long time of silence. He was gentle, and sweet…but brave nonetheless. He was never someone she had expected herself to fall in love with after her first heartbreak, but maybe that was better…this man who would hold her heart in his palms gently, softly, careful as to never wound it again. He became her confidant, her new best friend…her new deep love. She had grown up, her priorities changed, and so did whom she had come to love.

And she married him one spring day, when the cherry blossoms bloomed in full, and the colour of the wind was pink and spelled sweet like cake. She married him, surrounded by friends, teachers, parents, and those who cared about her. She finally took the first step in getting away from that heartbreak. She had fallen in love again, and she was happy again. She didn't want to think about anything else. She didn't want to worry about anything else.

This was a time that she deserved to be happy.

And she did.

She became a mother, of a little boy and a little girl. She lived in a good family—with a good husband, and loving children. She was happy, to be able to enjoy this sweet fantastic elixir again, to be lost and preserved in her chrysalis of euphoria. She never wanted to be torn away from this feeling again.

But things of happiness never last long…

She became pregnant again, with her third child. Once again, she felt joy and she glowed…but the village came under attack, and through the heat of the battle she was forced into premature labour. The child did not survive. Her happiness was torn away again…

And she was forced to confront her past.

_You're broken, and I can't seem  
To do anything right for you  
I'm just another obstacle  
The Queen of Superfluous  
Help, so go, get on with it  
I'll stay out of the way  
It's not like I want to go  
But why should I stay?_

He had been there, unexpectedly, coincidentally, and rather distasteful in all. He was there, to save her and the midwife, to protect her as she gave birth…to watch as she wept for the death of her child. He watched her fall apart, all over again. But this time, it wasn't over him—it wasn't over the past they had shared, but the life she had worked so hard to reconstruct, to build after having everything shattered. She had found love again, found the happiness she so rightly deserved, only to have that broken as well.

And even now, he wanted to hold her so much, to comfort her, as she shattered into pieces. He deserved this kind of pain, not her, never her, that was what he thought. But the life he got wasn't what he wanted, but it was what he had to live with.

The woman he married so early on born him a son very soon into the marriage. He was content to raise his child, to love him as much as his father once did. He was supposed to lead the family now—it would be his duty, with his son and wife. But it was never real happiness, not like the kind she had created. He didn't love his wife, not like how she loved her husband. He cared deeply for his son, but it couldn't compare to the love she had for the child she lost. But he knew this should be what he gets, for hurting her so badly—his placid and pleasant life, with no real heartbreak or tragedy.

He should count himself lucky.

He didn't like to see her cry—he hated to see her cry. It felt awful, even after all these years, to see the tears come from her brown orbs, to see her shoulders shutter as she whimpers so softly that you could barely hear it. He hated the torment it her eyes, the pain she had to go through. He knew that this was so much more painful than what he did to her—at least then, she could move on.

She would never move on from this.

After the rage of the battles was over, he went to see her in the hospital. He knew he shouldn't go see her. She should be with her husband, and not be reminded of him—the man who broke her heart, the man who watched her lose her child…he knew that he was a man that she did not want to remember. He was the man she always felt pain around. He knew that she wanted to be able to forget their past and to move on. But things are never quite as simple. She may no longer love him, but he would always love _her_. He would always keep his vow, to make sure that she was happy…yet, he had broken it—broken her once again.

He wanted to save her and her baby, to protect them both. But he couldn't, even though he was so much stronger than before—he couldn't save them. The child was gone, and she was left in shambles. He hated knowing the fact that he could've spared her the pain…to know that he could have made her happy…but he didn't keep his vow.

Sometimes, he wondered if he ever would be able too. She was so far away now, beyond his reach. For that one moment, when he saved her—he held on to her once more, felt the touch of her skin, her smell, the glow she had from carrying her child. But that was all torn away once again. If he could trade all of his happiness for her's, then he would be content. But his happiness wasn't really worth much.

He was afraid, of what he would say, of what she would say…if it would bring up such unpleasantness, or past nostalgia.

Because right now, she was a stranger to him. They had changed so much…he didn't know what to do anymore.

All he knew was that he needed to see her one more time—and this would be the last. After this, he could be happy just to see her content, to leave her be and let her be happy.

_We might as well be strangers  
And I know we can't be friends anymore  
There's no happy ending here  
Can you tell me, what's the point?  
From birth we're dying, what's the use in trying?  
So we might as well be strangers_  
_And in ten years or so I'll see you  
You'll call me what's your name  
We'll smile  
Faces rushing through our minds  
Then we're gone again  
…We're gone again_

And he stepped in the clean white hospital room. She lay so gently on the bed, as her husband held her hand, his head rest softly on her shoulder. He felt a sudden tug at his heart as he watched them like this. He always feared one day that someone would take her away…he hated that thought. But after what had passed between them, it was expected. And he was happy that she had once again found someone to love so deeply—to forget the hurt he had caused and moved on.

She did. And he was back in her life again.

She turned to look at him, her eyes full of surprise. In her mind, she was questioning herself why he was here. Her husband seemed to have sensed it too, for he looked up to see him standing in the doorway of the hospital room. Slowly, he let go of his wife's hand and went to the man who saved her.

"Neji…Thank you…for saving Tenten's life. I don't know how to thank you."

"I am glad I was able to help in some way, Koyasu, and I'm sorry for your loss."

He nodded in thanks, quiet, somber. For a moment, he turned and looked at his wife, told her he was going to go get her something to eat, and that he would be back. She smiled at him, and nodded. And for the first time in a long time, they were alone together.

"How are you feeling…"

"I'm all right."

"That's good."

"I want to thank you for saving me."

"It was just my duty…"

It felt awkward, totally unlike before. He was talking to an absolute stranger—but everything was so familiar, as if nothing had changed at all. He didn't know what to do. He was scarred. He wanted to leave—she was all right, he shouldn't be here to remind her of her pain anymore. He should leave.

He turned to go.

"Why Neji?"

He stopped in his tracks. He turned back to her slowly, to watch her sit up, to see the tears pour down her eyes. They were red and swollen, just like when he told her that he didn't love her so many years ago.

"Tenten…"

"Why did you leave me, Neji? Why…why did I have to lose my baby…? Why does this keep happening? Why?"

Slowly, he went over to her and sat down gently on the bed. He held her softly against his chest as she cried, her breath in hitches, her tears staining his shirt. This was the opportunity he never got when he first hurt her, to comfort her, to hold her, to assure her that everything was going to be all right.

"I'm sorry…about everything. But, it will be all right. You know it. You're strong Tenten, and you have your family to support you. You'll get through it."

And for that moment, it would be an eternity for them, holding onto each other so tightly, afraid that if they let go both of them would shatter into pieces of stained glass.

But even eternity ends.

He released her, said his goodbyes to both her and her husband, and left the white hospital room.

They were once again strangers to each other, until one day where they would be able to touch again.

_We might as well be strangers  
And I know we can't be friends anymore  
There's no happy ending here  
Can you tell me, what's the point?  
From birth we're dying, what's the use in trying?  
So we might as well be strangers  
Strangers  
Strangers  
We're strangers  
Just strangers…_

* * *

Fin

* * *

**Author's Note: **Haha! I've finally finished this little ficlet of mine. ((smiles)) I hope everybody enjoyed reading this as much I did writing it. I would like to thank Christine-chan for letting me use her two songs as the parts for Neji and Tenten, and to Sara-chan for letting me use her song "Strangers" for the epilogue. I would also like to thank my wonderful beta, K-chan, for betaing this fic for me. ((glomps)) I would also like to thank everyone who has read _Something Better_. I hope dearly you all liked it.

Arigatou gozimasu.

_Jia Z._

* * *

© June 2005 by Jia Zhang. All rights reserved.


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